Happy Womb Eviction day dude! If I see you out and about I can definintely get a round for you

Yeah, I’ll ignore how gross that first part sounds for a free round. Any particular place I’d see you “out and about”?



I always thought birthdays were for family and nice treats if you enjoy those. Like cookies! 

Well my family’s dead so I tend to prefer the drinks. Wouldn’t turn down cookies, though. You know, if they’re good.


I’m not entirely sure I want to venture to the Spring Festival again. It was enjoyable but certainly something was off…

Off how? This whole town is kinda weird. Get them drunk in one spot and doesn’t surprise me shit’s a little off.


Sounds painful handy. You a medic?

I’m ex-fire crew. Hazard of the Job, it happens. Ashkent this again? Right sure, fine. Yeah, it was here. 

 There was a blaze out by some old complex, a hotel or office block maybe. I can’t remember, but it was a wreck even before the fire, bad wiring and crumbling concrete. A big draw for high schoolers and people who should know better. It got pulled down not long after.

Nope, just get injured a lot. It’s a lot quicker to know how to do a patch up yourself if you can. Not to mention when you’re miles out in the middle of the woods by yourself, you better know how to take care of shit like that.

That’s intense. Can’t blame you for being ex-fire crew after all that. Guessing this happened before I got to town. How long ago was that?


Oh it was a blast, eight weeks as a crash test dummy. I’ve had my fill of hospital wards. There should be loyalty cards; fifth visit’s free.

The floor gave out and decided to take me with it.

There really should be. Especially in this country. Might be able to afford some of those visits then. The healthcare here makes me really glad I heal pretty quickly and know how to do my own stitches. 

Yeah sounds like lots of fun. How’d that even happen? Was it an earthquake or something? Was it here in Ashkent?


Are they not aware that they are not the only one who do this gross shit?

Hey, at least they’ll get plantar warts.

Guess not. Or they just don’t care. Maybe they lost their smell, who knows.

If only. It’d serve them right if they got foot fungus. Knowing my luck, though, they’ll be back next week. Still with no socks. Ought to be some sort of punishment for this shit.


Huh, okay. Must just be us me, then. Was there a big party last night? I know that festival is still going on…or whatever. It’s kinda lame.

Considering i can’t really Pretty sure. I can handle my alcohol pretty well.

Not that I know of. Sunday nights are usually pretty tame. Guess not in your case. Did you figure out who the house belonged to, yet?

Well did you do other shit, then? Any drugs? 


Seems like you’re enjoying it more than the other alternatives, so there’s that bright side.

It’s still weird they would ask you for your shoe size, of all the things customers say. 

I guess they figure since I ask them, they get to ask back. Cleary they missed the part where I don’t give a shit about their shoe size.